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国外也有段子手,你也是佛系球迷

友人们大家好,接待来到每周的“海外也可以有段子手”!上周的南美洲比赛场所精粹看点恒河沙数,马德里比赛克性格很顽强在辛劳劳碌或巨大压力面前不屈皇家马德里勇夺亚洲超级杯,Chelsea狂胜了与Arsenal Football Club的点子之战,曼彻斯特联俱乐部爆冷门小败,而曼彻斯特城俱乐部、巴萨等球队则纷纭顺遂完胜。好了,话非常的少说,让大家快来看看歪果仁们的佳绩戏弄吧!

伙伴们我们好,迎接来到周周的“国外也会有段子手”!下一日的欧洲比赛地方优异看点不可胜举:Chelsea与克雷塔罗握手言和,曼联俱乐部输给西汉姆联俱乐部,而Arsenal Football Club和曼城俱乐部则顺遂狂胜。La Liga比赛场馆,巴萨战平毕包,一而再再三再四三轮车不胜;而皇家马德里则与马德里比赛互交白卷,再一次错过登顶良机。好了,话十分的少说,让大家快来看看歪果仁们的奇妙调侃吧!

同伙们我们好,应接来到周周的“外国也是有段子手”!上周的亚洲比赛场馆精粹看点不计其数,波特兰取胜了与曼彻斯特城俱乐部的UEFA Champions League大旨对决,皇家马德里足球俱乐部、巴萨和拜仁俱乐部也扰攘获得先机。周日的联赛比赛场面,拜仁开普敦俱乐部提前6轮锁定亚军,Manchester United阻击了曼彻斯特城超前夺冠的步子,巴萨、Arsenal Football Club等队纷繁完胜,而皇家马德里俱乐部、马竞、切尔西等球队则获得平局。好了,话相当的少说,让大家快来看看歪果仁们的优秀作弄吧!

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要害之战,Chelsea3-2阿森纳俱乐部

Shriek:这一次自身不会负伤了,因为小编的心早就麻木了。(Can't feel pain if we're already numb.卡塔尔(قطر‎

J_A_Y_x:拜会小编厂的新后防线,感到和太岁的新装差不离吧…(Meet new Arsenal defending, I think the Emperors new clothes look quite like this.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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SleepyDani:看笔者厂竞赛的认为如同养儿女,你希望他能好学不倦,但老是都给您带给学渣形似的战绩。但那又能怎么呢,难道还是能甩掉他咋地?(沃特ching arsenal’s match is like when you have a child and you really want him to be smart but he just keeps bringing Cs and Ds Home, but you know you can’t and shouldn’t give up on him.卡塔尔国

AyRhu:这般踢下去,埃梅里大概3月就得被炒了!估量那个时候洛佩德吉也多数下课了,恰恰来任教本人厂…(Emery will be out by December if it goes like this, replaced by Lolpetegui who will be leaving Madrid about same time.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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JoJnrShabadoo:那般经过了非常的短的时间直接让阿森纳俱乐部隔开降级区,教师的宏伟进献什么人人能知?(Who knew that Wenger was actually over achieving massively by keeping Arsenal out the relegation battle?State of Qatar

off_ice_performance:科瓦契奇那猛一不坐替代人员席,看来格外不习于旧贯啊…(Kovacic probably got confused because he wasn’t sitting in the bench.卡塔尔国

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Saichander:Morata二零一八年或然切尔西的Torres,但方今一度改成奥Hus的Torres了!(Moratawas the Chelsea Torres last year now he's the Liverpool Torres.卡塔尔国

Lookattheclock:埃梅里当然不会满足一场平局!所以他就输给Chelsea了…(Emery didn't want a draw so he just saw a winning Chelsea.卡塔尔

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Koassde:阿森纳俱乐部的题目就在于,他们呈现最好的球员,竟然是刚从法乙联赛签来的19岁老马…(Arsenal's issue is their best player on the pitch is a 19 year old kid from french League 2.卡塔尔

Rompskee:现行反革命想给Bellerin洗白,已经越来越不方便了…(Being a Bellerinapologist is getting harder and harder.卡塔尔国

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成绩不好,Manchester United1-3West Ham United Football Club

JihadDerp:曼怜。(Moan United.)

Eff_Jay:穆离尼奥。(Mourinhout.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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ParisHL:我们不是刚在英联杯踢了迈克斯Field吗,将来那是在踢第2轮?(Didn't we play Maccles田野 the other day, or is this the second leg?卡塔尔国

ABloodEagle:笔者觉着穆帅得来三个八年包改动的售后服务才行…(Mourinhoshould come with a three year return warranty.卡塔尔

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break2n:曼彻斯特联足球俱乐部照旧有多少个好音信的!一是那赛季乌特勒支和曼彻斯特城足球俱乐部最少有一支是拿不到联赛亚军的;二是曼彻斯特联已经离家降级区8分之多,三是费莱尼表现很好,已是Manchester United最有威慑的进攻点了!(Positives for United: At least 1 of Liverpool and City cannot win the league at a time. 8 Points clear of relegation. Fellaini looking like one of the most dangerous attacking options.State of Qatar

SexyMooli:还会有个好音信,就是上周不用付出Sanchez那8.5万镑的获胜奖金,大约赚翻了!(Another positive. Don't have to pay Alexis an additional £85,000 bonus this week. Quite a bargain.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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ErydayMansOnTheBlock:Sanchez没伤没病,也随着球队去主场了,但却连大名单都没进去。他那步入曼联俱乐部9个月来到底获得哪些了…(Alexisdidn't even make the squad. No injury, travelled with the team, but didn't make it. What a nine months he has had...卡塔尔(قطر‎

Ericdrye:获取了大概1500万的票子吧!(150 million cash I think.State of Qatar

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JavBG17:要是费莱尼已经在场上了,那您在第90分钟落后的时候仍然为能够换上哪个人去争顶头球呢?(If Fellaini is already on the pitch, who are man u going to bring on for that 90th minute header?卡塔尔(قطر‎

MurrayBookchinIsBae:今夜大家要成为段子之王了…(Tonight we king on memes.State of Qatar

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UnpopularViewsBot:你依旧作为特别的叁个死去,要么苟活到见证本身形成了停业专家。(You either die a special one, or you live long enough to see yourself become the specialist in failure.卡塔尔(قطر‎

(注:此句原出自《蝙蝠侠:铜锈绿骑士》,“特殊的二个”和“退步行家”均是穆帅精华语录之一。State of Qatar

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AdenintheGlaven:好向往Pellegrini陆12虚岁还应该有叁只秀发啊!(I am envious at Pellegrini's head of hair at 65.卡塔尔

Estova:好了Rooney笔者精晓是您,请不要再用大号了!(Well Rooney I know it’s you, use your own account pls.State of Qatar

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Kveien:West Ham United Football Club真是没出息,赢一支小球队就会欢畅成那样了!(Can't believe these west ham fans are celebrating after beating a small team, shame on them.卡塔尔(قطر‎

Eff_Jay:很为西汉姆联俱乐部感觉安慰,想要保级就得在曼彻斯特联足球俱乐部那样的中级球队身上拿分才行啊!(it's nice to see West Ham leading, they really need to pick up points against mid-table opposition like Man United if they want to remain in PL this season.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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Fedward:干什么有人会说Manchester United的交锋无聊啊,难道那赛季还只怕有比看他俩竞赛更滑稽的事呢?(I don’t know why people say Man Utd are not entertaining to watch, been enjoying most of their matches this season.卡塔尔(قطر‎

Primary_Platform:Manchester United未来早已比二零一一年莫耶斯同时的积分还要低了…(United are now on less points at this stage of the season than they were in 二零一二 when Moyes was in charge.卡塔尔

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激情对决,阿雷格里港3-0曼彻斯特城足球俱乐部

Great-Band-Name:望着Chamberlain在温得和克的进球,就恍如在看从不愿和你上床的前女票在和新欢拍的性爱录像带同样…(When you see goal of Ox , it just feels like to see a sex tape of your ex who never did that with you.State of Qatar

AleArdu_:曼彻斯特城足球俱乐部,你永恒不会独行!(City you will never walk alone.卡塔尔

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RVP_20_ :尤文和波特兰的后防线是还是不是调换灵魂了…(Juve transferred their defense with Liverpool.State of Qatar

goldengirl_7:哈哈哈,克拉科夫便是曼彻斯特城这赛季蒙受的最硬打击吧!(Lol Liverpool have been the biggest cock to City this season.)

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ChipAyten:假如每场比赛都踢曼城俱乐部就好了,那样卧铺不早已争夺第一了吧?(If the schedule was City 38 times a season we'd be champs already.卡塔尔国

ethanicles7:自身看Sanne的展现依旧不易的,由他挡住下的Manchester City F.C.的抢攻,可Billy物浦后卫Lovren和范戴克加起来都多!(I'm almost positive that Sané managed to stop more City attacks than Van Dijk and Lovren combined.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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PreJuryFlop:曼彻斯特城还一贯不造出来地铁吗?(Did Man City even make it off their Bus?卡塔尔国

Kaklefrosk:见状Salah受伤时,Egypt全国都深陷了紧迫状态,一辆救护车都从开罗开到印第安纳波利斯了!(阿拉伯Egypt共和国must be in total emergency status right now, ambulances driving from Cairo to Liverpool when Salah got injured.

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Agüero带帽,曼城俱乐部6-1哈镇

Domaldinh0:总的看丁丁受到损伤对曼彻斯特城的熏陶不小呀,你看本场比赛得分都没上双!(You can see City are really missing De Bruyne today, they even cannot score 10.卡塔尔(قطر‎

Bobby_Goaldado:正是,要不是逼迫进了6个球,曼彻斯特城不就0-1输给哈镇了啊?(Yes, if you ignore the 6 bare goals they conceded then Hudders田野(field卡塔尔 won 1-0.State of Qatar

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J_Briggs_3:看本人城竞技的以为到犹如在交合,若是它不像,那就申明本人实在是在滚床单。(It’s always like sex except I’m having it.卡塔尔(قطر‎

Hardingnat:曼彻斯特城俱乐部应该先给对手发叁个符合规律和安全警报才对…(Man City need to come with a health and safety warning to their rivals.State of Qatar

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LiptonBlackTea:讲个笑话:曼彻斯特城足球俱乐部的板凳席席上还坐着Sterling、马赫(mǎ hèState of Qatar雷斯、Sanne和Walker…(Sterling, Mahrez, Sane, Walker that city bench was a joke.State of Qatar

AggravatingPickle:嘿?他们的品位有那么菜吗?(Oh they're not that bad.卡塔尔国

图片 24MagicGnome97:Agüero早餐到底吃了什么样,好想给本人魔的队员也都吃部分…(What the fuck did Aguero eat for breakfast and where can I get some for our players?卡塔尔(قطر‎

Mobilehavoc:那竞赛就应有界定同不经常候出台的席尔瓦的多少!(There should be a limit of how many Silvas can be played at one time.卡塔尔

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:看球还能够有效避孕?

火热之战,Chelsea1-1奥Hus

bluenokia2:啊~Azar,那速度,那进球,那屁股,小编当成欲罢不可能了…(Omg Hazard, that speed, that goal, that arse, can’t hold myself now…卡塔尔

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AmnesiaFX:作为比利时的印第安纳波利斯观球的观众,天知道笔者是有多纠葛…(As a Belgian Liverpool fan I don't know how I feel about this...卡塔尔

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HankMoodyMaddafakaaa:看得本身头脑都不佳使了,那难道正是神仙打斗么…(My mind is blown. What am i watching? Aliens fighting?卡塔尔国

Smrifire:不要让本场交锋让您忘了曼联俱乐部1-3输给了West Ham United Football Club啊!(Don't let this match distract you from the fact that United lost 3-1 to West ham.卡塔尔国

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Codespyder:踢得真赏心悦目,你们俩能否周周都踢竞赛啊?(You two can play each other every week as far as I'm concerned. What an excellent games.卡塔尔(قطر‎

Red_Baron22:每一次Azar拿球的时候,吓得本人菊华都飞快100倍…(My butt is clenching intensifies 100x every time Hazard gets the ball.卡塔尔国

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Cynicalreason:曼彻斯特城俱乐部、克拉科夫和切尔西都在秀骚操作,Tottenham Hotspur Football Club和阿森纳足球俱乐部也还O几把K,唯有他俩的另二个表兄弟跟不上趟了…(City, Liverpool & Chelsea making a show, Spurs & Arsenal are damn thereabouts .. and then there’s the retarded cousin...卡塔尔(قطر‎

BasicallyNeymar:您是说埃弗顿足球俱乐部?

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Vivlam:曼城俱乐部19分,乌特勒支19分,Chelsea17分,北伦敦俩敌人各15分,二〇一八年Top5已经成型了!(City 19, Pool 19 and Chelsea 17, North 伦敦 Bottlers 15 each. Top 5 shaping up.)

dead_siaf:不是top6吗?就那样瞧不起沃特福德俱乐部吗?(It’s top 6, you forgot fucking Watford.State of Qatar

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Raymondliang:迎接Salah回到加州Davis分校桥,今后请你也上升原先在这里地的情状吧!(Welcome back to Chelsea, 穆罕默德·Salah. Back on form with us.卡塔尔

sunman6:Chelsea对密尔沃基,就如上一赛季波兹南对曼彻斯特城俱乐部平等了…(Is Chelseagoing to be for Liverpool what Liverpool was for Manchester City last season.卡塔尔

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C 罗Nardo无解倒钩,Real Madrid Club de Fútbol3-0尤文图斯俱乐部

Merforce1:Real Madrid Club de Fútbol玩FIFA游戏的难度品级依次为:UEFA Champions League级、生手级、半专门的职业级、专门的学问级、世界级、神话级和西班牙足球甲级联赛级。(Difficulty levels for RM playing fifa: CL, 阿Mataiur, Semi-pro, Professional, World Class, Legendary, Liga.卡塔尔国

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Brokingiant:走在雨巷中,寒风料峭透;是何人的泪珠随风飞走,是什么人的衷心被雨淋透。(I’m walking down the cold street and at first I thought it was raining, but it is the bitter tears of me. And they are flowing from my heart.State of Qatar

Beddevils:本身好怀恋这个时候,大家一同纵横UEFA Champions League的时候。(I miss the days we ruled CL.卡塔尔国

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JPaken:小编们在俄联邦踢国际足球联合会世界杯的时候,能还是不能够每场赛后都演奏一下欧洲季军联赛宗旨曲…(I'd like to order champions league anthems for Russia World Cup, please卡塔尔

GRI23:C 罗Nardo一定会成为炮hub上的风行的,因为他叁个劲射向老妇人!(Ronaldoshould be the new pornhub star with how much he loves fucking Old Ladies.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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Lovebanter:自小编用尽无数脑筋去恨C 罗Nardo,可她却三回又一遍用那样的表现打肿我的脸!(I invest so much time and energy into hating Ronaldo and he goes and does this every time to make me shit.卡塔尔国

Guy_Ostrich:与其说把那几个恨意都转载为纯粹的赏识吧,只怕50年内都不会再有那般的球员了!(All the hate energy was invested into appreciating something I might not see again for 50 years.State of Qatar

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NIRossoneri:阿莱格里是还是不是让球员们像踢决赛相近踢这一场较量了…(I'm guessing Allegri's team talk was to treat this like a final.State of Qatar

Totally_Uninvolved:尤文制止重复输掉最后一轮比赛的最好措施,正是不要进决赛!(Juve: You can't choke in the final if you don't even reach it.State of Qatar

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Ninjapizzadude:布冯在场上的首先次触球,竟然是从球网里捡球…(Buffons first touch of the game was to pick the ball from the back of the net. Stats!)

yammertime27:有人黑C 罗Nardo只会进保姆球,但C 罗Nardo打了她们的脸,最终的保姆球根本就没进!(Ronaldoproving the haters wrong with the tap in miss at the end.卡塔尔(قطر‎

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Wigos:假如你在赛前就告诉本身C罗将会主宰一切,那小编大约得…亲你两嘴巴子(If you had told me before this game that 罗Nardo would completely dominate the match then I would have kissed you.卡塔尔

HippoBigga:上次把皇家马德里俱乐部从UEFA Champions League淘汰的球队就是尤文,而这一度是3年前的事了…(Crazy to think that Juve was the last team to eliminate Madrid from the Champions League... Almost three years ago.卡塔尔国

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tweazz :Benzema三保伊瓜因是或不是在竞赛什么人浪费的火候越来越多…(Benzema and higuain to compete in wasting scoring chances.卡塔尔

Kaint58:浪费时机的前提,是你首先得创建开火候啊…(But you should have some chances to waste at first.卡塔尔

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